Toxic Relationships | by Cher Bliss

 By Cher Bliss

Too many times I have seen women enter into toxic relationships and then either feel stuck in them, are blind to it because they think they are in love, or they think the guy will change.  I, for one, was one of those women.  I can tell you, from experience, that they won’t change unless they really want to and they have God helping them. 

I thought, because my boyfriend was a Christian and he prayed to God and studied the bible, that, for sure, he would change.  I just knew God would convict his heart and he would change.  I would break up with him, too many times to count, in hopes that by losing me he would change.  God will show us signs, before we get too involved, whether or not that relationship will be edifying and God-glorifying or not. 

One thing, us women, tend to ignore is our brains and the signs from God.  We tend to think with our hearts too much.  Let me tell you right now…if your boyfriend is not treating you like a queen with the utmost love and respect right now, he will certainly NOT do it when you get married.  Marriage is not the answer.  If anything, it will only get worse and he will get more controlling or less affectionate and interested in you because he has secured you and you can’t go anywhere now. 

Your boyfriend should be treating you the way he would treat you when you get married.  It is important to see all sides of a person before making a commitment to them.  Some important things to ask yourself, before committing to anyone, are the following:

• Does your boyfriend/husband:
• Yell and scream at you
• Call you names
• Belittle you in any way
• Make you feel stupid
• Think his way is the only way and he will never learn from you
• Tell you how to dress and when to wear makeup
• Time you when you go to the store and want to know every step you made when you were there
• Accuse you of things constantly
• Not trust you for no reason
• Isolate you from your friends and family
• Get physical with you when angry
• Punish you
• Constantly pointing out your flaws
• Have an obsessive need to be with you every minute of every day
• Require to tell him every word that any male says to you, even if it’s a simple good morning
• Get insanely jealous over every little thing

If he displays any of these behaviors, he is NOT loving you as God commands him to love his woman.  A man can have some really good qualities and be so romantic and loving at times, but then turn around, in a split second, and display the behaviors above.  Don’t be fooled by his charm and romantic gestures.  Love is a lot more than romance.

Some women also get caught up in the “submit to your husbands” rule.  What they fail to realize is that everyone, including men, submit to a higher power…God.  God commands men to first love their wives.  Let’s examine what it means to LOVE your wife.

God says to love your wife as Christ loves the Church.  That would include, but not limited to:

• Be encouraging
• Be uplifting
• Make you feel loved
• Pray for you
• Lead you spiritually to God
• Be a servant to you
• Be willing to die for you
• Protect you
• Provide for you
• Take care of you in all areas (emotionally, physically, etc.)
• Submit to you

Does your man do all this for you?  Does he treat you like you are God’s daughter?  He should be treating you as he would want another man to treat his own daughter.  You are God’s daughter and are very precious and should be treated as such. 

On the other hand, us women need to treat our men the same way.  We are to submit unto each other and love each other.  We are also to respect our husbands.  Do we respect our husbands and appreciate the sacrifices they make for us? 

A Toxic Relationship can go both ways here.  Are you not loving and respecting your husband?  You need to ask yourself that question.  Are you making yourself available to love or to receive love from your husband?  Your husband may want to love you, but you don’t treat him with love and respect.  It works both ways here, ladies. 

If you are having marital problems, try loving your husband first.  And don’t just do one thing and give up.  It may take a while for your husband to see the change in you.  Make sure you are consistent so he knows he can trust that you aren’t going back to your old ways.  Once he realizes this, he will respond to your love.  He won’t be able to help but respond to you.  Most men react to what you do.  So if you treat him good, he will treat you good. 

Marriage is a selfless act of love.  It is a decision to love (in the action sense) our spouse forever.  It’s a decision to give up all our selfish desires for our spouse.  Marriage means we are to serve our spouse and sacrifice our happiness for theirs.  But here’s the catch…if we are sacrificing and making our spouse happy, then our spouse will do the same in return and sacrifice their happiness for ours.  If this is done, then both spouses will be happy. 

Some advice for single women:

If your boyfriend is not loving you the right way now, then you need to leave that relationship.  It WILL NOT get better when you get married.  Put that idea out of your head.  Marriage does not make things better, it just complicates them.  Before you get married, your relationship needs to be more than good.  He needs to be loving you as described above.  If he is not doing that now, he will not do it in marriage.  This is the time to see if he would make a good spouse.  This time is the prep for marriage.  He needs to have the character already built into him before marriage.  YOU cannot change him.  Only God can do that and ONLY if he wants to.  Don’t even waste your precious time on a man that does not know how to love you or God.  In order to serve God, he must be able to serve you.

Advice for the married ladies:

Check yourself first and make the necessary changes you need to make.  Set an example for your husband.  Show him he can trust you.  Then start asking him to do bible studies with you or read devotionals together.  Go to church together and serve him.  He will get the idea and start reacting to you.  Don’t give up. 

I hope you have been blessed with this and may God bless you and your relationship.

What It Means For a Woman to Serve and Glorify God Through Marriage

By Cher Bliss

Women don’t realize how important they are to their man and to God. We think that if we aren’t the ones going out there on the front lines fighting the spiritual war, then we aren’t serving God. In singleness, we can do that. We can get on the front lines and volunteer at church and become mentors, ect. But, in marriage, how are we glorifying God?

In marriage, our man/husband only has limited strength, courage, endurance and understanding. But, with his wife by his side, giving him encouragement, ideas, and understanding of topics he may not understand, we are enabling him to be complete and stronger and able to do great things for the Kingdom of God. If we weren’t there for our husbands like that, there is no way they could accomplish the things that they do when they have us. We are reaching so many more through the union of our marriage, therefore, furthering the Kingdom of God and serving Him.

This doesn’t mean that when you get married you have to stop serving on the front lines. But, your marriage needs to take first priority over everything else in your life. Keeping God first and foremost in your marriage is glorifying God as He has called us to do.

By keeping true to God and to your husband and modeling the kind of marriage God intended it to be, you are also serving as a role model to other women and girls. Showing them what a good, godly and fulfilling marriage looks like and how to make it last a lifetime. That is serving God as well.

I guarantee, if a woman uses her God-given wisdom and discernment to pick a worthy man of God, and she selflessly and continuously loves (in the action sense) and encourages her husband, she will get that in return from her husband and God will bless her and her marriage abundantly. God will give her peace, love and true joy and happiness in that union between her husband and God.

The key here is that this will not work if God is not the center of that marriage. While it is certainly possible to be happy in a marriage without God, it will not be truly fulfilling, as God is the only one that can completely fulfill a person and bless the marital union.

Now what do I mean by Love in the action sense? Love is not just a feeling. It’s not all about the butterflies in the stomach and that starry-eyed feeling you have in the beginning of your marriage. Love is also an action word. By loving your husband, you are showing him respect when you don’t feel like it. You are encouraging him when he doesn’t return it to you. You are actively and physically taking care of his needs and desires. You are putting him first (in the earthly sense) before your own needs and desires. You are doing the little things that show him he is important to you and listening to him, trying to understand him. You are being patient and kind to him, yet lovingly correcting him when it’s needed (pray on that one). When in an argument, be loving and understanding as you speak to him. Be his best friend and make sure he knows he is the center of your world.

Keep in mind, God is always number one, first and foremost, but on earth, your husband is to be first and foremost above all others on earth, even your children. That doesn’t mean you love anyone less, but God directs us “Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord” Colossians 3:18 ESV and Mark 10:6-9 ESV “But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

God also instructs, “submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ” Ephesians 5:21 ESV. God gives us a lot of instruction when it comes to marriage.He compares it to His love for the Church, therefore, it must be extremely important and sacred.

By loving our husbands in the action sense of the word, that is submitting to our husbands and thereby obeying God and serving God. If our marriage and our attitudes do not reflect this, then we need to get busy. If your husband is a God-fearing, God-seeking man and you start submitting or loving your husband as God intended it to be, He WILL respond favorably. You will see a big difference in your marriage and in your man.

Women, we all fantasize about having this loving and romantic marriage til death do us part.We can achieve that if we use our God-given power on our men. They will be putty in our hands and that spark with be kept alive. Be your husband’s best friend, confidant, girlfriend and play date. Be romantic with him and playful and remind him in playful little ways how much you love him and how much he means to you. Make him your everything and he will make you his everything. Women…We have the power, now use it to get what you want.

God be with you and be blessed in your marriage.

From Thought to Personal Sermon: Being a Living Sacrifice

By Dale Szewczyk

Much of my correction comes from within me. Not that I meant for it to work that way, just that the more I learn about God, the more I can see for myself on many things. Of course it helps to keep Godly counsel, but much of my correction is enlightenment that has been given to me by the Holy Spirit. I reflect I looked at things a year ago, two years ago, three years ago; and WOW. I almost don't recognize myself. For me, I am proof of what happens when a Christian leaves his first love and lives in the flesh. Not that I meant to do that, but I did by doing my own thing. I put value on my feelings, on my creedo, on my understanding, on my humility, on my morals. All righteous that is not of God is counted as filthy rags, and here I was thinking I was pretty cool compared to the world. Yeah, I guess I was the very best of filth. Isn't that something to boast of? DO I get a crown? Perhaps a cookie? Maybe a medal? How about a ribbon I can wear like a bandolier? 

For those who don't know, I judge myself more than anyone, no one holds a candle to my sin. What? Because you're gay you think you have me beat? Or maybe you're a crack addict? Porn addict? Had sex with a hundred people before you were 20? Exactly what is it that wins you sinner of the year? 

Sorry folks, as a Christian I am enlightened to my sin, the very sin I am saved from, but sin that is nailed to the cross for the very fact it is pure evil. Sin is not okay for a Christian to willfully commit, after all Jesus was tortured and brutally murdered because of sin. 

I came back fearing for my salvation when I use to believe in once saved always saved. Why on Earth would I worry so much if I was saved? I didn't worry as much when I was younger, even when I was sinning then too (willfully), but yet after a 15 year downslide it caught up to me. 

Why? How? But... but... but... what about personal doctrine of human opinions that pass as theology? Can't I listen to one of those and go on doing my thing? Well, my thing should be GOD'S THING!!!! So, on that note... I'd need to be doing God's thing before I can say yes to that.

Oh, but I am a writer, that was who I defined myself as. I defined myself as a gift that God gave me. Oh, but I sought happiness and fulfillment in people. Not in God. I worried over money, home, maybe a few luxuries, yes; I as a Christian build a kingdom of sand... but on a Rock. 

You see, I was saved. I just wandered off. You see, a Christian can drift, they can leave their first love. They get so far removed that their very name is removed from the book of life. It's funny the stuff you learn when you read past your favorite scriptures, there is a lot to read, and it isn't all one thing. It's like saying either grace or faith saves you, when it takes both. Or that Jesus is only wrath or love, when He is both. It's like saying that you can't or can lose your salvation, when it is a matter of the heart based on the structural integrity of your heart. 

Here's the rub, God knows your heart. he knows if you are truly repented, He knows if you're going to come back, or if you ever belonged to Him to begin with. He will know if your love for Him was planted in deep soil or shallow soil, or if you love Him with your head and not your heart. Some believe they have Him in their heart, but do they? Their fruit, what does it say? Am I reading their fruit right? Hmmm, I know when I see others who live like I lived, they worry me. I fear for them. Because I knew in my soul that I was sin for it if I didn't get back on track. 

When I strip away the self, lay baron before the Lord, a willing and living sacrifice; why is it I still worry about those who live how I lived? I say there's a good reason for it. 

My best advice for anyone, the sermon I was meant to preach from testimony is this; DO NOT, I say again, DO NOT, live how I lived! Did you hear that? I am not telling to not be you, I am telling you to not be like I was. What was I again? A waste. A sad, sad waste of a witness. If I was salt I wouldn't have had flavor, so then what is the point? 

As a child going to church and seeing Christians talk about how they were before they were saved compared to now, I use to think that I didn't think I had a testimony. Then when I willfully sinned, how then was the Word going to convict me? Well read it long enough and the conviction comes. I sought God with tears and brokenness, with the enlightenment that I tried to be my own savior when He is my savior. I drifted so far, and He brought me back. I wanted Him, and He took me in. Like the prodigal son, I returned home.

Here's something I have learned; everything we do is worship, everything we do is praise, everything we do, is for God. So when we sin, we are not doing those things, but slapping Him in the face for the gift He gave us. Which is why repentance is so important. Why we can't live like we once was. As a new creation, as transformed into a living sacrifice, we are to live as such. For we are now part of His family, to live in defiance is suicide, and lacking. It isn't just hell that sucks, it's living for eternity without Him, because even now we are not separated from Him. We have never truly felt a complete absence of God. But hell is just that. This isn't about, not living it up in Bling-bling land, it's about losing our place with God. We want to be in Heaven because GOD IS THERE! That is home.

So then, what is this place that the carnals call reality? It is the decaying creation that man killed thousands of years ago, and soon we will be off of it. Until then, we are to serve God, serve man as God would have us, love each other, and love God. Enjoy His blessings, and bless each other. For when we bless each other, if we were to do it all the time, and all of us did it, no one would ever do without, nor would anyone drift away from God. 

Stay calm, and keep your love for God! If you truly love Him, you seek to obey Him, and seek to do His will, and you will be fulfilled.

WEDNESDAY Service at the Saint's Den, ROMANS, February 19th

The Mighty and Merciful Message of Romans 1-8
By Pastor John Piper

Paul writes the letter to the Roman church to mobilize their support for his mission to Spain. In Romans 15:24 he writes, "I hope to see you in passing as I go to Spain, and to be helped on my journey there by you." He has never been to Rome and has never met most of these Christians. So he lays out his gospel for them to see in these 16 chapters.

Oh that all our missionaries would know the book of Romans and preach the book of Romans. And Oh that those of us who send would know the book of Romans and live the book of Romans so that we would send missionaries the way Paul wanted to be sent and supported from Rome to Spain. The mighty and merciful message of this book will make rich Americans strip down to a more wartime lifestyle and pour their resources into the cause of the gospel. And the mighty and merciful message of this book, in the mouths of suffering missionaries, will break the powers of darkness and plant the Church of Christ in the hardest places.

The Multi-Cultural, Global Aspect of This Letter

It’s not surprising then as you start to read this letter, there is a multi-cultural, global point to it. In Romans 1:5 Paul tells us the goal of his apostleship: "We have received grace and apostleship to bring about the obedience of faith for the sake of his name among all the nations." That’s why he preaches. That’s why he is going to Spain. That’s why he writes this letter: to bring about faith in Jesus Christ and the obedience that comes from it – "among all nations!" Romans is about the nations – the people groups who don’t yet believe on Christ. Who are not justified and not yet sanctified and therefore will not be glorified if they are not reached with the gospel.

Then in verse 14 he tells us his apostolic obligation again: "I am under obligation both to Greeks and to barbarians, both to the wise and to the foolish." And lest we think he has left out the Jews, he says in verse 16, "I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek." Jews, Greeks, Barbarians, wise, foolish! In other words, this mighty and merciful message of the book of Romans breaks through national distinctions and cultural distinctions and educational distinctions.

This is utterly crucial to see in our pluralistic time – a time very much like the first century when the church of Christ spread so rapidly. Christianity is not a tribal religion, but calls for faith and allegiance from every tribe and tongue and people and nation. Jesus is not one among many gods. He is Lord of lords and King of kings, and there is no other name under heaven by which all men must be saved. The mighty, merciful message of Romans is not just one way of salvation among many. It is the way of salvation, because Jesus Christ is the one and only Son of God and Savior.

This claim has always been disputed. And it is especially disputed today in America, even among professing Christians, and, of course, among Muslims and Jews. In Friday’s Star Tribune there was another article rejecting the necessity of faith in Christ. A joint commission of Catholic bishops and American rabbis released a document called "Reflection on Covenant and Mission." The main thrust, the author said, is this: "Efforts to convert Jews are ‘no longer theologically acceptable’ . . . because the Jewish people already ‘abide in covenant with God" (Friday, Sept. 20, 2002, p. A23). In other words, there is one way of salvation for Jews who reject Christ, and there is another way of salvation for Christians who receive Christ.

This is a false and heartbreaking statement from Christian bishops in view of what Jesus said, "Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life; whoever does not obey the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God remains on him" (John 3:36). Therefore, concerning the Gentiles who accept him and the Jews who reject him, Jesus said, "Many [the Gentiles] will come from east and west and recline at table with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven, while the sons of the kingdom [the Jewish people who reject him] will be thrown into the outer darkness. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth." (Matthew 8:11-12).

So it is utterly crucial that we see the universal claims of the mighty and merciful message of Romans. We are not dealing here with a human opinion, or a human philosophy, or a self-improvement program, or a tribal religion, or something parochial and limited. We are dealing here with the true news that the one and only God has acted uniquely in history to save people by sending his one and only Son to die for sinners and rise again. To reject this news is to perish.

The Thesis of the Letter: Romans 1:16-17

So Paul states his point in Romans 1:16-17 and then explains and applies it in the rest of the letter. "I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. 17 For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith for faith, as it is written, ‘The righteous shall live by faith.’" First, Paul says that his message – his gospel – is mighty and merciful to save: it is the power of God unto salvation. And this salvation is through faith. The power of the gospel to save penetrates to our souls with faith in Jesus Christ.

Then in verse 17 he explains why the gospel has this power: "For in it the righteousness of God is revealed." The gospel has the power to save those who trust Christ because it reveals the righteousness of God. What does that mean?

Romans 1:18 – 3:20: Why All of Us Need to Be Saved

Before he explains what it means, Paul spends Romans 1:18 – 3:19 to show why all of us need to be saved. You see his summary in Romans 3:9, "We have already charged that all, both Jews and Greeks, are under sin." And verse 19: "Every mouth [is] stopped, and the whole world [is] held accountable to God." So we are all sinners. We are all under God’s wrath (1:18). We have no righteousness that could commend us to him, and 3:20 makes plain that we can never save or justify ourselves: "By works of the law no human being will be justified in his sight." We are sinners. We are under God’s just and holy wrath. And we cannot save or justify ourselves by works.

Romans 3:21-31: Revelation of the Righteousness of God by Faith in Jesus and Its Implications

Now Paul returns to his main point of Romans 1:16-17 and explains what it means that the gospel is the power of God to save believers because it reveals the righteousness of God by faith. He says in verse 21-22, "But now the righteousness of God has been manifested [here he’s picking up the revealing of God’s righteousness in verse 17] apart from the law, although the Law and the Prophets bear witness to it – 22 the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all who believe."

So what is the revealing of the righteousness of God that gives the gospel its power and saves believers? It’s the manifesting of "God’s righteousness that comes through faith in Jesus." It’s God’s righteousness revealed as a gift to us through faith. It’s what we call justification. So Paul says in verse 24 that sinners who trust Christ "are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus." The revelation of God’s righteousness that makes the gospel the power of God unto salvation is the demonstration and the gift of God’s righteousness to sinners who trust in Christ.

Romans 3:25 explains how God can justify sinners without being unjust: "God put [Christ] forward as a propitiation by his blood, to be received by faith. This was to show God's righteousness, because in his divine forbearance he had passed over former sins." In other words, God ordained for his Son to die in our place so that the Father’s wrath and curse would be on him and not on those who believe. In this way he shows his hatred for sin and his just dealing with it. So now, as verse 26 says, he can be "just and the justifier of the one who has faith in Jesus."

So the death of Christ is the foundation of our justification. If we believe in Jesus, God counts us righteous for Jesus’ sake. We are seen and treated as just. That is justification. And in verse 28 he makes clear that this right standing with God is not by works but by faith, "For we hold that one is justified by faith apart from works of the law."

And right here don’t miss the global, missionary, multi-cultural implication of this. Paul himself draws it out in verses 29-30, "Or is God the God of Jews only? Is he not the God of Gentiles [the nations] also? Yes, of Gentiles also, 30 since God is one. He will justify the circumcised by faith and the uncircumcised through faith." Justification by faith in Christ is the mighty and merciful global message we have for all the nations and all the people groups and all the people we will ever meet. There is one Savior, one cross, one resurrection and one way to be right with the one God: having his righteousness imputed to us by faith in Christ, not by works.

Romans 4: Abraham’s Justification by Faith apart from Works

In chapter 4 Paul makes the case for justification by faith apart from works by using Abraham as an example: "Abraham believed God, and it was counted to him as righteousness" (verse 3). One of the most precious verses in the book is built off Abraham’s example (verse 5): "And to the one who does not work but trusts him who justifies the ungodly, his faith is counted as righteousness." Not work but faith justifies. And not the godly but the ungodly are justified. This is good news indeed – this is the mighty and merciful message of Romans.

Romans 5: Hope and Security in the Face of Suffering and Death

In chapter 5 Paul sums up with verse 1, "Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ." Then he opens the reality of suffering and death for the justified – and anticipates the huge emphasis on suffering in chapter 8. Verse 3 tells us why we can rejoice in tribulation – it leads to patience and approvedness and hope.

Then against the backdrop of this tribulation he argues exactly the same way he does in chapter 8 – from the greater to the lesser – if God can do a hard thing, he can do an easy thing. Recall in Romans 8:32 he says, "He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all [the hard thing], how shall he not with him freely give us all things [the easy thing]?" That’s exactly the way Paul argues here in Romans 5:9, "Since, therefore, we have now been justified by his blood [that’s the hard thing], much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God [that’s the easy thing]." Same kind of argument in verse 10: "For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son [that’s the hard thing], much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life [that’s the easy thing]."

The point is our hope and security in the face of suffering and death, just like it is in Romans 8. Normal Christianity is tribulation. "Through many tribulations we must enter the kingdom of God" (Acts 14:22). Don’t ever forget that the mighty and merciful message of Romans is put forth in the context of expected suffering.

Death is a massive reality in all cultures. If you have a gospel you must have some explanation of death and some hope in the face of death. That is what Paul takes up in Romans 5:12-21, and he does it by comparing Adam, whose disobedience brought sin and death, with Christ, whose obedience brought righteousness and life. Verse 19 states the contrast most clearly: "For as by the one man’s [Adam’s] disobedience the many were made sinners, so by the one man’s [Christ’s] obedience the many will be made righteous." Adam’s sin and condemnation were imputed to us because we are united to him by birth; so Christ’s obedience and exoneration were imputed to us because we are united to him by faith.

Then Paul sums up the triumph of grace through Christ in verse 21: ". . . So that as sin reigned in death, grace also might reign through righteousness leading to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."

Romans 6: Union with Christ Is Death to Sin and Deliverance from Slavery

Which led to a problem that had to be solved: If we are really justified by faith alone and where sin abounds grace abounds all the more, then why not sin that grace may abound? And Paul answers this in chapter 6 with the teaching that faith unites us to Christ in a real way so that we actually experience with him a death to sin and a deliverance from its slavery (6:6, 17-18). All justified people are being sanctified.

Romans 7: Dead to the Law that We May Belong to Another

Then in chapter 7 Paul argues that it is not an orientation on law-keeping that sanctifies us – or makes us like Jesus. No, "you also have died to the law through the body of Christ, so that you may belong to another, to him who has been raised from the dead, in order that we may bear fruit for God. . . We are released from the law, having died to that which held us captive, so that we serve not under the old written code but in the new life of the Spirit" (7:4, 6).

The Christian life is lived in the free gift and earnest pursuit of a relation to Jesus Christ "That you might belong to another!" (7:4). He is the might and the mercy and the model and the mandate of the Christian life.

Romans 8: Nothing Can Separate Us from the Love of Christ

This brought us then in these recent weeks to Romans 8 – the great 8. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ (verse 35)? Do you see the connection between that and Romans 7:4? Dead to the law so that we might belong to another – to him who was raised from the dead, Jesus Christ. That is the key to living and the key to dying. Who then shall separate us from the love of Christ. Answer: Nothing. Who shall separate us from the love of God in Christ? Answer: Nothing.

"So whether we live or whether we die we are the Lord’s, for to this end Christ died and rose again, that he might be Lord both of the living and the dead" (Romans 14:8-9). Live under his lordship, die under his lordship. And always sing to the invincible love of God in Christ.

SUNDAY Service at the Saint's Den:BOOK OF ROMANS, February 9th

THE GREATEST THING in the WORLD: An Overview of Romans 1-7

By Pastor John Piper

  

Today we come to the end of our exposition of Romans 1-7. My aim today is to venture the impossible: a summary of the first seven chapters of Romans and of 104 sermons that began April, 1998. My prayer and my longing is that the structure of truth – the vision of reality – in this book would become the structure of your mind and your vision of reality. That you would think about God and sin and Christ and life the way the apostle Paul does – the way God does. And that you would thus become a humble lion-hearted alien and exile in America, ready to lay down your life for the glory of Christ and the salvation of sinners.

A Summary of Romans 1-7

Romans teaches that the most fundamental problem in the universe is that God's human creatures – all of us – have sinned and fallen short of his glory and are now condemned under the omnipotent wrath of God. There is the problem of our condition called sin. And there is the problem of its consequence called wrath. Another way to say it is that there is real guilt on every person because of sin, and there is real condemnation over every person because the Judge and Maker of the universe is just and holy.

Paul's conclusion after two chapters of as acting the prosecuting attorney is Romans 3:9, "What then? Are we better than they? Not at all; for we have already charged that both Jews and Greeks are all under sin; as it is written, 'THERE IS NONE RIGHTEOUS, NOT EVEN ONE.'" Romans 3:22-23, "There is no distinction; for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." And there's a good definition of what our sin is and why it has mainly to do with God, not man.

When he describes the sins of his own people in Romans 2:24, the climax of the indictment is this: "The name of God is blasphemed among the Gentiles because of you." What makes sin sin is not first that it hurts people, but that it blasphemes God. This is the ultimate evil and the ultimate outrage in the universe.

The glory of God is not honored.

The holiness of God is not reverenced.

The greatness of God is not admired.

The power of God is not praised.

The truth of God is not sought.

The wisdom of God is not esteemed.

The beauty of God is not treasured.

The goodness of God is not savored.

The faithfulness of God is not trusted.

The promises of God are not relied upon.

The commandments of God are not obeyed.

The justice of God is not respected.

The wrath of God is not feared.

The grace of God is not cherished.

The presence of God is not prized.

The person of God is not loved.

The infinite, all-glorious Creator of the universe, by whom and for whom all things exist (Rom. 11:36) – who holds every person's life in being at every moment (Acts 17:25) – is disregarded, disbelieved, disobeyed, and dishonored by everybody in the world. That is the ultimate outrage of the universe.

Why is it that people can become emotionally and morally indignant over poverty and exploitation and prejudice and the injustice of man against man and yet feel little or no remorse or indignation that God is so belittled? It's because of sin. That is what sin is. Sin is esteeming and valuing and honoring and enjoying man and his creations above God. So even our man-centered anger at the hurt of sin is part of sin. God is marginal in human life. That is our sin, our condition.

And the consequence of this condition is the wrath of God. Romans 1:18, "The wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who suppress the truth in unrighteousness . . . . (21) For even though they knew God, they did not honor Him as God or give thanks." The failure to make the goodness and glory of God the center of our lives brings the wrath of God upon us.

Romans 2:5, "Because of your stubbornness and unrepentant heart you are storing up wrath for yourself in the day of wrath and revelation of the righteous judgment of God." In Romans 2:8, "[Those who] do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness, [will receive] wrath and fury." When we hear words like this – that we are all "under sin" and that sinners will receive the "wrath and fury" of God – we need be still and let that sink in. These are terrible words. When the omnipotent God has wrath and fury, no greater negative force can be conceived. We speak of the fury of a hurricane that flattens buildings or the fury of a tornado that snaps off trees like toothpicks. But these forces are as nothing compared to the fury of the wrath of God.

In Revelation 14:10-11 John gropes for language to describe the length and depth of hell. He says that sinners "will drink of the wine of the wrath of God, which is mixed in full strength in the cup of His anger; and he will be tormented with fire and brimstone in the presence of the holy angels and in the presence of the Lamb. And the smoke of their torment goes up forever and ever; they have no rest day and night." There is nothing more fearful in reality or in imagination than the prospect of everlasting, never-ending, omnipotent, unimpeachably just and righteous divine wrath and fury. And that is the consequence of our sin.

Unless we get this clear in our heads and powerful in our emotions, the love of God will be reduced to sentimentalism or to a mere assistance for our self-help improvement and recovery plans. It will not be to us the infinitely precious, tremblingly embraced treasure that it really is.

The Turning Point: The Law of God Cannot Justify or Sanctify

Now comes to major turning point in the book. When Paul, the prosecuting attorney, has done his job, he ends in Romans 3:19 with the words that "every mouth [is stopped] and all the world [has become] accountable to God." Then he adds, in essence, Don't even begin to think that you can take God's commandments – God's law – and make them a means of getting right with God. "By the works of the Law no flesh will be justified in His sight; for through the Law comes the knowledge of sin" (Rom. 3:20). And not only that, Don't even begin to think that you can take God's commandments and make them the means of becoming a new person. You can't be acquitted by the law, and you can't be transformed by the law. The Law of God cannot justify you and the law cannot sanctify you.

On the contrary, the message of Romans 3-7 is that God sent his Son, Jesus Christ into the world to live and die and rise again to be the ground of our justification and the power of our sanctification. If anyone anywhere in the world is going to get right with God or bear fruit for God, it will be through Jesus Christ alone. And he alone will get the glory. He is the great ground of our justification, and the great power of our sanctification.

Let's take these two great works of God (justification and sanctification) one at a time and see how Christ is God's remedy for our condemnation and how Christ is God's remedy for our contamination. How we escape the wrath of God into his favor, and how we escape the power of sin into lives of holiness and love.

Justification: God's Remedy for Our Condemnation

Before there can be any talk of changing the way we live – fixing our minds, fixing our families, fixing our churches, fixing our society – before any of that, and as the indispensable foundation for all of that, we must first escape from the wrath of God and be counted by him as righteous. Before there can be any God-honoring transformation there has to be the removal of God's condemnation. Which means justification must precede and provide the foundation for sanctification.

So Paul deals with it first. The central text is Romans 3:24-25. Guilty, condemned sinners are "justified as a gift by His grace through the redemption which is in Christ Jesus; whom God displayed publicly as a propitiation in His blood through faith." Every phrase is precious to guilty sinners tottering on the brink of hell.

"Justified" is precious because it means God declares us to be just and righteous in his sight even before we escape from the power of sin.

"As a gift" is precious because it means we can't earn this. It is free. We don't deserve it. We don't get fixed before we have it. It is the basis for getting fixed.

"By His grace" is precious because it means that behind the wrath of God there is another mighty impulse in the heart of God toward us, grace, moving God, in complete freedom, to save us from his own anger.

"Through the redemption" is precious because it means our sins are forgiven and we are set free – redeemed – from condemnation.

"Which is in Christ Jesus" is precious because it means that Jesus himself and not us and not the law is the foundation of our justification. He is a much more solid rock to stand on than my law-keeping ever could be.

"Whom God displayed publicly" is precious because this great transaction of redemption was not done in a corner, or in some mythological story, but in history under a Roman governor before many witnesses.

"As a propitiation" is precious because it means that the wrath of God that we deserved was removed. Christ absorbed it, and took it away. He became the curse for us and took away the judgment of God. God was propitiated.

"In His blood" is precious because it means that Christ died for me. He poured out his life-blood in my place and did what I could never do to save me. Only the death of the Son of God could save a sinner like me.

"Through faith" is precious because it shows how you and I become beneficiaries of all this grace. We don't work for it, we receive it as a gift by faith. Paul underlines it in Romans 5:17 with the words, "Those who receive . . . the gift of righteousness will reign in life through the One, Jesus Christ." By faith alone we receive the pardon and the imputed righteousness of Jesus.

So justification is God's act of counting us to be righteous, even while we are yet sinners by grace alone, through faith alone, on the basis of Christ's work alone, for the glory of God alone. This is the greatest thing in the world – to know God without wrath and full of grace because of Christ.

That is God's remedy for our condemnation and how we escape the wrath of God into his favor. We call it justification.

Now, how is Christ God's remedy for our contamination? How do we escape the power of sin into lives of holiness and love?

Sanctification: God's Remedy for Our Contamination

Justification is not a process of transformation. It is a declaration that before God we have a right standing, acquitted and righteous. It happens in the twinkling of an eye when we first believe in Christ. Sanctification is a process of transformation. It goes on through life and is based on the fixed, firm, unshakable ground of justification. That's the key difference.

And Christ is the key to both, not law-keeping. And faith in Christ is the means for both. We've seen it with justification. Now let's just remind ourselves what we have seen about sanctification. Paul says in Romans 6:19, "Yield your members to righteousness for sanctification" (rsv). In other words, give yourselves to this process of change. But how? How do justified sinners change into fruit-bearing followers of Christ? Romans 7:4 has proved to be a key verse for us: "Therefore, my brethren, you also were made to die to the Law through the body of Christ, so that you might be joined to another, to Him who was raised from the dead, in order that we might bear fruit for God."

We who are justified want to bear fruit for God – we want to bear the fruit of "love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control" (Gal. 5:22-23). We want to become humble lion-hearted aliens and exiles in America, ready to lay down our lives for the glory of Christ and the salvation of sinners.

How does it happen? Not by preoccupation with the law but by dying to the law and belonging to another – Jesus Christ, risen from the dead. You embrace Jesus. You hold fast to Jesus. You trust Jesus. You treasure Jesus. You fellowship with Jesus. You love Jesus. Jesus becomes the passion of your life. That's what Romans 7:4 implies: Die to law-keeping and give yourselves to your all-satisfying marriage union with Jesus Christ.

So that's where we are now as we come to the Great Eight. No condemnation, because of Christ. And deep transformation because of Christ. One is called justification. One is called sanctification. We take our stand daily by faith on the once-for-all, unshakable rock of our Justification in Christ. And then we give ourselves daily by faith to the sanctifying work of Jesus in our lives. Oh, come and trust him. Unbeliever, come to him and put your faith in him, and receive him as your righteousness, your pardon, your treasure. Believer, come to him, again and again and again and take him as your treasure, the rock of your righteousness before God, and the power of your love toward men.

It's Over? Can One Really Leave God?

The other day I lost a friend on Facebook for a comment I made. He misread it and due to personal pain ended the online friendship. He's a good guy, with a sweet heart. I know this because I've seen him from time to time on FB, and he's always kind, funny, and never an ill word. You see, I posted that if someone can truly walk away from God they weren't saved to begin with, but if they are truly saved, then they will come back. Lets break this down.

When a person asks Jesus into their hearts, fully believing in Him, their heart is made new. We are new creatures. We are filled with the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit doesn't fill a non-believer. Now I know people can change, when we are confronted with carnal things it can challenge us to the point where leave for a while. BUT, if we were really saved, then we haven't completely left Him.

You see, this friend was a preacher (which I didn't know until he mentioned it). Something happened to him to cause him to lose faith. And he claims he's an Atheist now. While I understand to a point why he might want to leave (we all have pain, even me) I don't understand being angry at God when he clearly doesn't believe anymore. How can you be mad, or hate something/someone you don't believe in? Call it what you will, but God is not done with this of mine. I believe he's still a Christian even if he doesn't. And I believe God will bring him back.

2 Corinthians 5:17-19
New King James Version (NKJV)

17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. 18 Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation, 19 that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them, and has committed to us the word of reconciliation.


So how does one become a new creation and then undo it? Does a butterfly one day say, "meh, this flying thing is for the birds, I think I'll go back to being a caterpillar"?  I mean, you can tell the butterfly that he/she is still a butterfly, that if they would only be a caterpillar if they never changed into a butterfly, but if that butterfly really believes it's a caterpillar it will take a lot of convincing.

I want to make this clear since I wasn't clear before. My friend thought I was passing judgment on him, I wasn't. I'm dictating who's going to heaven and who's not. This isn't even about that. This is about the fact that if you meant it when you became born-again you can't undo that. You may be mad at God, maybe hate Him, but you still believe. You accepted Him, you're a new creation. How do you undo a new creation? I'm never said my friend wasn't born-again to begin with. As a matter of fact, that post wasn't about anyone in particular. It was based on a conversation I have had with my father on several occasions. I use to say that a person can turn their back on God, just like a husband can do to a wife. But after so much meditation on the Word, it struck me that was impossible. If your heart is really in it, you're a new creature.

Romans 10:1-9
New King James Version (NKJV)

1 Brethren, my heart’s desire and prayer to God for Israel is that they may be saved. 2 For I bear them witness that they have a zeal for God, but not according to knowledge. 3 For they being ignorant of God’s righteousness, and seeking to establish their own righteousness, have not submitted to the righteousness of God. 4 For Christ is the end of the law for righteousness to everyone who believes.

5 For Moses writes about the righteousness which is of the law, “The man who does those things shall live by them.” 6 But the righteousness of faith speaks in this way, “Do not say in your heart, ‘Who will ascend into heaven?’" (that is, to bring Christ down from above) 7 or, “‘Who will descend into the abyss?’” (that is, to bring Christ up from the dead). 8 But what does it say? “The word is near you, in your mouth and in your heart” (that is, the word of faith which we preach): 9 that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.


That last line, "saved", pass tense. You have already been saved. One time. If you already confessed with your mouth and believed in your heart, then you are saved!

I hope my friend reads this. No matter what he has gone through, God still loves him. God doesn't hurt or kill, that's the devil's work. God brings life, He's love. And He loves everyone. Salvation isn't about avoiding hell, it's about everlasting life with our Father. Everlasting life that we get the moment we're saved.

I'm praying that laborers come across my friend's path, that God's Word penetrates. While he may be saved, life is so much better when you focus on the Lord, pray and praise! I want everyone to know such salvation, I want everyone to know what I know. But free will is the one thing God won't change. He created us, and gave us the will to choose. And even Christians who walk away from God and have it pretty bad here on Earth.

I love you guys, I don't want to see anyone suffer. And I love my friend. He may not call me a friend after that post, but I love my fellow brother. I wish I could have had a chance to talk to him more, to say the words from the Holy Spirit that would resonate with him. I never knew of his pain, and if God uses me to help him, or to help you, then I'm doing God's work.


Peace, love, and blessings. 
Dale E.

A CALL to Arms... of Love

Inspiration even when many see none.

Okay, I don't care your political leaning, or who you voted for; but I'm sure you have seen people say they will stand by their guns and Bibles, and have a come and get it attitude, right? Well I have.

You see, I'm a gun owner, and a Christian. I believe I have the right to defend myself and my family by any force necessary, however, there are few things I'd die for.

I'd die for my family and God. My guns (I only own two, and they are hunting guns) I love them, and I hate the fact that our nation is working hard to take that right away from me. But it's coming. I doubt by the time I'm fifty (if there is even a US left, assuming it's not a new nation) there will be no such thing as gun owner. People will have to make a choice. Which will be, either die before giving them up, or giving them up freely.

The problem with this is, what's the point if by standing your ground you get yourself killed? For the Christian they might want to read more of the Bible.

While there are times where standing your ground is acceptable in the Word of God, more than anything God sent his people into the world to spread His message, and when he did they didn't kill people in the name of God. I'm not saying there weren't battles in the Old Testament where God okayed battle, but I'm talking about those who died for their faith. Look at Peter, how it turned out for him. John the Baptist. And on. What did Jesus ask us to do?

Matthew 16:24

(24) Then said Jesus unto his disciples," If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me."

Matthew 6:33

(33) "But seek first the Kingdom of God, and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto to you."

This section of Matthew 6 talks about not worrying about food, water, and clothing for tomorrow. But it can go with anything else.

You want to keep the right to bare arms? So do I, but I don't want to see half of my family get themselves killed over it, or half of the country for that matter. If you're not a Christian, then my words here probably have no affect on you. But for those of you who are, and keep the Bible as important as guns, let me share this with you:

James 1:2-4

(2)"Consider it pure joy, My brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, (3) because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. (4)"Let perseverance finish its work so that you may mature and complete, not lack in anything."

Which do you believe deserves the highest obedience? God or country? I understand the idea behind defending freedom, but when the government takes over completely, they will have all the cards. And when Americans decide to react violently they will not do our side any justice. It will makes us look like the bad guys. I say dwell on God. As much as you can. Leave the prayer channel open all the time, meditate on Him. When you're at work, if you can think about other things and still do your job, think on Him. Focus on what God would want you to do. Because if you're a Christian, this isn't about what you want, it's about what God wants. After all, didn't He see it coming? He could have stopped it and didn't. So there must be a reason.

Hebrews 4:12

"For the Word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double edge sword, it penetrates even dividing the soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the hearts."

I'd say the Word is even stronger than guns. It's alive! What does that mean?

Well, when we read the Bible, and we're open to God He does communicate with us. It's to the point for me where I can't open my Bible and read without my eyes hitting something very relevant in my life. When He speaks to us (for some they really hear Him, and that's fine) He usually does it through thoughts, and feeling. He guides us. But we cannot go to the scriptures with our own thinking. We must be willing to read exactly what God means. We can understand it better if we allow ourselves to be open to God.

2 Corinthians 10:3-5

(3) "For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh: (4) (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;) (5) Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;"

Ephesians 6:12

(12) For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

There's a time and place for everything. We need to drop our pride and follow Him. And to be honest I find it to be much more joyful. When I worried about gun laws, it ate me up. I knew there was no way we can fight this injustice and to do so rightly. But as in all things, I know fighting without violence, doing as God wants us to do, I feel complete.

Do not act out. If you do that then you are playing their game. The one word that means rebel is, "NO". But if you act out, you're saying, "YES" to their agenda, which means you're conforming They want to use you, they want to make you an example. They will us to make those who are against us, be against us that much more.

Romans 12:2

(2) And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

Bullets won't win this war. Our faith is all we have. Take away our guns, our rights, cast us into prison; who are we? We're children of God, the vessel of Christ who is mightier than anything man has devised. Kill us. Hurt us. Take from us. We rebel by staying true to our Father, and to our Lord.

Brothers and sisters, this IS not the age of fear, this IS not the age of anger; but the age of rejoicing. No matter when it's our time, we will soon be with our Lord. No one can take that away from us. Be of good cheer, for the Lord will command our steps if we ask Him to. 24/7 faith and prayer. Do not let the carnal world stop you from keeping faith.

They come at us with laws, they come for our freedoms, and we shall meet them in love.